Soul Nidre 
By Rachel Kann 
 

I said I did my best, 
but I know there is better yet 
within this lonely bag of bones,
forgive me.

I tried, but not hard enough,
forgive me.

I gave up,
forgive me.

I disrespected my inner wisdom,
forgive me.

I lied when I said I was fine, 
I’m not fine,
forgive me.

I took your pure love for granted, 
mishandled your divinity,
forgive me.

I swept my indiscretions under the rug 
instead of addressing them,
forgive me.

I lusted and succumbed to my hunger,
forgive me.

I fell in love with my own woundedness,
forgive me.

I have transgressed in ways I am cannot even name, 
my shame so deep 
I am unable to awaken 
to the full brunt 
of my inner wickedness.
I gave up,
I tangoed with my death wish,
I let fear win,
I hid my brightness,
I dimmed my light,
I denied my own power,
I lurked in shadows,
acted like I didn’t matter,
shattered my own scattershot heart,
forgive me.

I lacked faith,
forgive me.

I/Me/Us/We did not trust,
forgive us.

Excerpt from Soul Nidre, originally published in Hevria